Thursday, June 23, 2011

c-ing

i’ve been often-told that i am cynical, or secondly that i’m contrary or being contrary, but the correct term would be questioning. i demand thinking or am sensitive to a lack of thinking. i am critical of unthinking; not entirely unable to abide but almost. it is not by choice, design, or aim, but by reaction. and though i have intellect to intervene the “event,” that is what i act upon, i have to purposefully steer myself (by utilizing heavy influence) away from my adverse or repulsed reaction to the unthinker. it can be tiring to do so. and why steer away from that reaction? my reaction to unthinking, to unbalanced thought or dynamic presence of mind and body, is my nature. i am steward to that nature, sentinel and guardian. i represent what i feel is best as do each of us. if i do not fully represent what i am, what my dynamic is, no one will. i proffer what i feel is best for the entire, not just my paltry singular dynamic. i find all connection important. my thoughts and awareness lay in the whole, not just the parts, but where i see the parts equally as the whole.

to note:  many will misuse or by misconception or lack of understanding/research or discovery will say that i am playing a “devil’s advocate” – but this is a narrow-minded label since i am not acting “for the sake of” nor am i purposefully picking stances less favoured. often, people will say “devil’s advocate” when they mean to say “contrary.” additionally i have no specific design on taking the opposing or unpopular stance; i serve my context-dynamic not specific aims or motives. my context-dynamic simply means who i am as i am connected to all things.

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